lifestyle

Why Madea is #GrandmaGoals

 

I was binge-watching Tyler Perry’s productions when I realized that Madea might just be the coolest grandmother under the sun, she is just the gift that keeps on giving.

madea
Source: Entertainment Weekly

Granted she is not the most stand up woman (given her interesting past occupations) but she definitely gives great advice and sheds some light on important life lessons. Let’s look at the moments when her advice just pulled at our heart strings… Or just made us laugh maniacally

  • When Lisa and Vanessa were seeking advice for a “friend” who’s husband was beating her and she made this ruthless but fitting remark

Vanessa: [with Lisa] A friend of ours is being beaten by her husband and we want to know what we should do.
Madea: Before or after his funeral?

  • When she just didn’t have the time for an abusive man

Madea: I remember this dude made me so mad, I didn’t even know how mad I was until I went to his funeral.
Helen: Why were you so mad at him?
Madea: Because he hit me. Yes he hit me… and I didn’t even know how mad I was until I saw him in his casket, he’s 8 feet under.
Myrtle: 6 feet, that’s how they bury people, Madea, 6 feet under.
Madea: That’s what I’m trying to say, I thought I was over what he did to me until I saw him at the funeral, I was so mad I beat him down 2 more feet

  • When she reassured Nikki that you can choose to not be reduced by your past

It ain’t where you come from honey it’s where you’re going. No matter what your mama was, who your daddy was, you can be anything you wanna be.

  • When she tallied up a woman’s worth.

 [after typing a bunch of numbers on the calculator] Girl, that man owe you 64 billion, 283 million, 974 trillion, 5 thousand, and 20 dollars and 82 cents.

  • When she let Brian know that you cannot give up on the people you truly love

Love is stronger than any addiction baby, hell it is one.

  • When she let Japan know that purity is a beautiful thing.

There’s nothing wrong with being a virgin. God searches to and fro for purity.

  • When she let Lilian know that money cannot solve all your problems

All that money’s gonna do is enhance the person that you are. If you’re a fool when you’re broke, you gon’ be a fool with money.

  • When she let Lu know that sometimes parents make hard choices but that doesn’t lessen their love for their children

A parent ain’t got no reason apologizing for working. I’m telling you right now… Parents do the best they can for their children.

  • When she used this undesired threat on George

If I come back up these stairs and you’re still in bed do you have any idea what I’m gonna do? I’m gon get completely naked and spoon.

  • When she gave this advice as a s/o to everybody in their “hoe” phase

The bible calls it know, they don’t call it sex. They say know, you know what that means? You’re suppose to know who the hell you’re having sex with.

 

Quotes taken from:

  1. A Madea Christmas(PLAY)
  2. Diary of a mad black woman
  3. Madea’s family reunion
  4. Madea’s witness protection
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